It is still unclear why some people are attracted to their own sex. Are they born with their predisposition? What role does the social environment play? To this day, nobody knows for sure. Same-sex love has always existed.
And in some eras and cultures, this form of love was highly regarded. Unfortunately, many people today still believe that homosexuals are sick or perverted. That is complete nonsense! Homosexuality is not an illness and therefore cannot be cured. And: Nobody can change a gay person's polarity!
Gays are everywhere!
Many celebrities profess to love menIf boys love boys - and not girls - they are homosexual. Most of them say: gay. But the feeling of being gay is not always clear and unambiguous from the outset. It's often a hunch. Sometimes it's a fear. That's why many people keep these thoughts to themselves at first. They are often confused and unsure. Afraid of the reactions of others. Everyone harbours a certain degree of homosexual predisposition. Many boys have homosexual contacts and fantasies. According to a survey, 62 per cent of the men questioned stated that they had had their first sexual experience with a boy or a man. For most men (around 90 per cent), it turns out over time that their homosexual tendencies are just part of a maturation phase during puberty. It was then a temporary thing that may have brought you exciting experiences for your future sex life. The other young men (around 10 per cent) realise spontaneously or over time that they are permanently attracted to the same sex or even both sexes. Some boys wonder whether it is perhaps just a phase in which they simply find boys interesting. That could also be the case. Because during puberty, the preference for one sex or the other can change from time to time. It can sometimes take years before it is clear who the heart beats for - boys, girls or both. And admitting these feelings is a big and sometimes difficult step for many gay men. It helps to share experiences with other homosexuals who have already done so.
How do I realise that I am gay?
It's not always immediately clear and unambiguous. But in a nutshell, you can say that you are gay if you have sexual feelings for boys (men) or can only fall in love with boys. Maybe you also find some girls interesting. But in a different, non-erotic way. Your feelings for boys are simply stronger. If you have sexual feelings for boys and girls at the same time, you are bisexual. Girls who love girls are lesbians. Girls who love boys and girls are also bisexual. Don't put yourself under pressure if you can't clearly categorise yourself yet. Because your feelings can change over the course of your life.
It's completely normal to be interested in your own gender! But: In contrast to girls, physical touching such as hugging, kissing or holding hands is still considered unmanly among boys. Anyone who dares to do so is usually mocked mercilessly. This is why it is often difficult for gay boys to come out as gay in their school class or among friends without being socially marginalised.
Am I gay if I dream about boys?
That doesn't have to be the case. Because everything we dream never comes true. Why should it be any different with these dreams? Nevertheless, it could be an indication that you have gay parts in you. That is normal. Because many people are not clearly heterosexual. Maybe it was just a dream. But if this dream keeps coming back, it could indicate an unfulfilled or suppressed desire for boys. Do you often think about boys when you masturbate? Then take a look at your reflection in the mirror and be completely honest with yourself. Allow the thought that you are (also) attracted to boys to enter your mind. How do you feel about this? How important is it for you to really want to experience this? Step by step, you are getting closer to your feelings. You don't have to commit yourself yet. But if you open yourself up to this thought, you will gain clarity more quickly. And if it's "just" a phase, then try it out. That's also part of puberty. You can always decide later.
Can I get rid of my homosexuality?
No! And if you've managed to embrace your homosexuality, like it and feel good about it, you won't want to. Because being gay is not a disease. And you can't decide not to be gay either. Why not? Because it's not up to your head. Your sexual orientation is stronger than your will. And it is inside you even before you consciously feel it for the first time. Anyone who tries to suppress their gayness will suffer sooner or later. Because it remains an unfulfilled, important, human need!